Comments on: Article on spanking, bondage and s&m feat. Professor Richard Wiseman

By: respectable but naked

respectable but naked — Sat, 12 Nov 2011 00:00:59 +0000

Now this is just adding fuel to the fire…

By: Magician Glasgow

Magician Glasgow — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 11:34:43 +0000

Never really seen the appeal of S&M. I dont really get how anyone could enjoy it. Each to their own I suppose…

By: ScreamingGreenConure

ScreamingGreenConure — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 00:57:09 +0000

I did in fact buy this Quirkology book and make curry, both are pretty awesome, actually.
Okay, on topic, I have a couple more criticisms. Firstly, the article says that stress hormones and testosterone increased during the “stimulation.” Sure, they dropped down once the beatings were over (they will continue until morale improves) – but doesn’t that mean that they were stressed out? One researcher mentioned in the article apparently said that the hormones might help women cope, or might be stress, but if it’s all ok in the first place why would they need a boost to cope? If washing the dishes gives the same closeness without the stress, isn’t that better?
I get what you are saying about trusting relationships, I really do, but I worry for people who trust their partner to hurt them. I want to give them a hug.

By: Alice

Alice — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 00:34:58 +0000

Great. Thanks SGC and Katherine. I *really* needed my yearning for that poached egg knowledge to get categorised under “S&M”. grrrrrr. Now it somehow stings just that little bit more.

Curries can be pretty dangerous. I once read this story about how a couple of streets were evacuated because a restaurant was experimenting with a killer hot recipe, and the resulting cloud of evil curry gas made people wheeze and cry in the surrounding streets. They thought it was a terrorist attack.
Incidentally if you get chilli in your eye, try holding an (open) bottle of malt vinegar underneath it. The fumes are supposed to neutralise the chilli. This wise old Chinese woman showed it me; it seems to work, but I don’t know why.

My favourite latently-romantic activity is doing those Jackson/Livingstone choose-your-own-adventure books with someone. It’s actually a bit like S&M because you have to trust each other completely before you can admit to being such utter nerds.

By: Aaris

Aaris — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 23:25:33 +0000

I think I have to agree with Berber Anna. I’m really agressive and Dominant in public, or in everyday life, but when the time comes im not usually the dominant one. I’m not sure about all this whipping stuff sounds kinda kinky. I knew this one guy that had a girlfriend who was into the spanking, and he always had like bruises on him. Nipple clamps… I guess theres a time for everything. I’m the kind of person that would try anything once.

By: Rebecca

Rebecca — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 21:41:57 +0000

So people who enjoy S&M….enjoy S&M?

Who’d have thought?

By: anonymous today in case my parents are reading

anonymous today in case my parents are reading — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 17:35:29 +0000

@ ScreamingGreenConure

I can understand your concerns but it really doesn’t work like that because it’s only fun if it’s in a trusting relationship. And as a general rule, it’s usually the masochist who suggests stuff to play at to their partner (there seems to be many more masochists looking for broad minded partners than there are sadists looking to dominate someone). As to control when the masochist is vulnerable, if the “top” messes up and gets the pain levels wrong, there is as much guilt and worry as if you accidentally knocked your partner over with the car. And as much trepidation about ever trying that particular activity again, no matter how much the masochist might ask!

Of course there will always be exceptions, but my experience is that it’s not something you even suggest until you are very sure of who you’re with and their character – and the hardest thing is to get “normal” people to agree to be try being mean to you for a while

By: ScreamingGreenConure

ScreamingGreenConure — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 17:02:25 +0000

Well, it looks like he writes good books. I’m going to go and buy Quirkology after work and possibly make a curry. It’s the same thing, and no beating or mental domination is involved. Glad that’s sorted.

By: Katherine

Katherine — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 16:45:00 +0000

Prof Wiseman would indeed be an excellent choice of dinner companion. He always comes across as very interesting, very interested and a most personable guy too. I can imagine lots of good conversation over the curry.

By: ScreamingGreenConure

ScreamingGreenConure — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 16:09:14 +0000

I don’t know. I can see the dominant person claiming that the submissive can stop things at any time, and the submissive maybe even confirming that, but what other pressure are they using? They have the other person in a vulnerable position. Is that person really going to feel able to back things down? Will they feel they’re letting the dominant one down, or that since they’re “in charge” they are doing the wrong thing by saying no, or if they are not hardcore enough they’re a problem? If they are asked if they are alright are they really just going to grit their teeth and say yes? I can imagine this kind of thing really messing with people. I could be totally wrong, but can you see my point?
I like this Richard Wiseman chap. I think he has the right idea and maybe people should just get together to make a nice curry instead of raising their hands to each other.