Well, so much for my theories.

I was delighted that they now seem to be placing the final few rounds genuinely in the hands of the public. Or at least I was, until the same public decided we should lose the sensational Ruth and keep any of the surely less remarkable boys. Good luck to Eoghan of course, for whom clearly Simon has a vision, but if all this editorial favouring and Northern Ireland voting means he wins over Alexandra in the final I’ll be absolutely hopping.

Meanwhile, my next few Saturday nights are clearly to be ruined by the partisan dialing of Northern Irish girls too easily swayed by the disingenuous accolades of a marionette jury. Bring back dolly-legged Austin and keep the vote English.

Thank you.