12th Jan – Been run down, limp and covered in snot all week. Not shifting. Cough! You all have my germs, how unfair.

12th Jan – Send me your top joke and if I like yours best I’ll follow you and RT all your tweets til I feel better and have something to say.

12th Jan – Fave so far RT @DanielNothing Throwing acid is wrong. In some people’s eyes.

12th Jan – Great but can’t ALL be Jimmy Carr RT @AnnekaHansen why don’t boxers have sex before a fight? Because they don’t fancy each other.

12th Jan – Generally poor, but occasional goodie: RT @nickhucks When women live together, apparently their periods become synchronised. I found that out from two girls who share a pad.

12th Jan – Will check later in the day: must go to meeting now. Suggest leaving it for a few hours so your top notch entries don’t get lost.

12th Jan – Getting better. RT @luke_griffin20 what’s brown and sticky?…human shit.

12th Jan – Vg RT @SeanTobinMagic I went to see my bank manager and he said that I am going to have to pay interest. I tried, but it was so boring.

12th Jan – Right. No more jokes PLEASE. Horrendous. And so many of you wish to die like your grandfathers. Shall keep wading and make a decision.

12th Jan@WillMcAlpine You win the dog category, definitely. X

13th Jan – Brilliant but knew it RT @MrWriteCzech What did Sigmund Freud say comes between fear and sex? Answer: Funf.

13th Jan – Good, yes, certainly. RT @Lukeandedshow 6/7 dwarves aren’t happy.

13th Jan – Great joke RT @thetimebank – clement freud, RIP !! http://tiny.cc/W3Cja

13th Jan – Satisfying. Winner soon RT @danielament just one, just one; what did the frog say to Bob Marley? reggae

13th Jan – Balancing decent joke with avoidance of obscenity and a twitterer I won’t deeply regret RTing. Hmm…

13th Jan – Winner declared. Thank you all. Cleverclever rather than ROFL, but standard of non-obscene ones v. poor… @MrWriteCzech What did Sigmund Freud say comes between fear and sex? Answer: Funf.

13th Jan – I shall be RTing @MrWriteCzech‘s tweets for a day or two. MWC, enjoy your 400k followers. Everyone be nice, even if you loved your joke…

13th Jan – Bit of a jump from 31 followers. Joke first told to me by @philosophybytes

13th Jan – Many of you didn’t get it. Makes it a wee bit funnier of course.

13th Jan – Doh! right in there with a pitch RT @MrWriteCzech learn French with jokes if that’s your thing. http://www.piurl.com/211T

13th Jan – RT @MrWriteCzech I put up a new bookshelf in a hurry. Sadlly it fell down and hit me on the head. I suppose I only have my shelf to blame.

13th Jan@danielament yours was second best, promise. Might have picked you if you’d have had more tweets. Sent you dm, if you’ve worked those out.

13th Jan – Sweet idea. (He prob sells these too…) RT @MrWriteCzech can anyone tell me who the singer is in this ad? http://www.piurl.com/211b

14th Jan – Obliged to RT @MrWriteCzech #ebooks should do more than pbooks. http://bit.ly/5jGEau to see just some of the potential. – and have a laugh.

14th Jan – That’s SO true RT @MrWriteCzech Those of you who didn’t know DB speaks German should read his book, Tricks of the Mind. http://bit.ly/4sB1Vz

14th Jan – Just so new followers know, I’m re-tweeting anything from @MrWriteCzech who won a competition. Just for another day at the most. X

14th Jan – ??RT @MrWriteCzech Not sure why DB has a ‘did-you-spill-my-girlfriend?’ look on his face on the cover of his book http://bit.ly/4sB1Vz

14th Jan – RT @_duncanhall Not sure how exactly you spill a girl/boy friend, but the man has a point, you do look fairly ‘rapey’.

14th Jan – Think I may start RTing utterly random people to see what happens. That’s what I’m going to do.

14th Jan – Random RT @blueradiorecord currently drawing thousands of ships

14th Jan – Random RT @travisalex Allston: who got the weed? Austin and I want nugget.

15th Jan – Random RT @Shayla_Bieber Omg. I am soo effin bored at home. : someone please tweet me. I am so bored -_-

15th Jan – This is too much fun RT @domster1983 @McRoach pah, I wish. Just had a poo in location toilet tho, that makes for a good afternoon 😀

15th Jan@nomistheman excellent! Will do. X

15th Jan – Not any more #randomRT @Boo2AGoose Is there a more stylish man out there than george lamb… think i have a secret man crush on him!

15th Jan – Random person but typing in juicy phrases into ‘search’. Expect occasional #randomRT, start a trend, I’m too easily amused.

15th Jan – Last one for now… #randomRT @knightknight I just did a wee out of the wrong hole 🙁

15th Jan – Ok that really is it now, off to bed #randomRT @tim7168 I really fancy the main character in Silent Witness.

15th Jan – RT @tim7168 I got retweeted by @derrenbrown! Woo!

15th Jan – RT @MrWriteCzech It was fun to see what an eclectic mix of followers Derren has. I enjoyed the banter and all the comments.

15th Jan – Big group hug for our guest tweeter and winner of the daft competition. Well done Jeremy! X

15th Jan – And apparently it was Tim Vine joke, so another thank you to Tim too.

15th Jan@JordanLWebb inundated. Probably 500+ to some. Only get to see a handful usually.

15th Jan – RT @richardcompton naughty christians! look what *else* they’ve been buying from Amazon http://www.piurl.com/218f

15th Jan – It’s the ‘also bought’ section that’s particularly rewarding.

15th Jan – Starting Michelangelo. Feels great, been ages RT @lordcoopy Look what db is up to! First time since Sept ’08! http://yfrog.com/1etyimij