I was very reticent to get onto Twitter. Why on earth would it be of any interest to anyone how I was conducting my days, and why on earth would I care how they went about theirs? It took much proselytising and a ready stream of drinks to have me reluctantly, whiningly, well-alright-I’ll-try-it-for a while-ly agree to pop my head round that particular door and see if it looked like a party I’d enjoy.

I twitter (I believe one twitters a tweet, but some seem to use ‘tweet’ as the verb, so I’m a little unsure) sporadically, with no particular agenda, mainly to pass on things that amuse. As this blog passes to the Twittersphere through the same feed, I figured less serious, personal tweets from me might balance out the grander posts from Mother Blog. Having said this, the number of my ‘followers’ (I prefer ‘disciples’, it’s just nattier) has grown to such proportions that I am, during quiet moments, wondering how I might go about embracing so many people to try something rather more nefarious. Bear with me, I’ll find something.

I try to scan at least my recent ‘mentions’ and replies as much as I can without endangering my career, getting run over or irritating my real-life companions to the point of violence. I’m aware that quite a proportion of these tweets boil down to people requesting I reply to them; a sadly insurmountable task given the numbers, were I to comply. So forgive me: I do read most tweets, and tend to DM a response to things I find interesting, but the numbers are huge and time is oftentimes sadly lacking.

I follow very few people, as I like to have only a manageable number of tweets pop up for worthwhile reading when I open up Twittelator, or Tweetie 2, or twatever. This is perhaps because I am a novice in this strange new world, and maybe I should throw myself in and follow anyone and everyone. For now, I have turned down requests to follow a good number of real-life friends for this reason, which shames me a little, and a million or so requests from friendly twitterers to do the same. As it is, I follow @stephenfry, because you get him free when you join Twitter; my co-conspirator and fluffer @andynyman, our own @lordcoopy and a small handful of other chums including the brilliant @serafinowicz.

As a performer with a public profile, Twitter puts me horribly close to real feedback, which is a mixed blessing. Very quickly one learns not to read reviews in order to remain sane (I don’t even read interviews or articles about myself any more), as one can skim past a hundred glowing comments and get to a single nasty dig which then eats away at one for days. And the internet has a habit of bringing out witless vitriol in people in a way that other fora tend not to. Politeness and decency are quickly abandoned by most when they are not face to face with those they criticise, and probably don’t even imagine that their comments might be read by the person in question. That one in a hundred comment, through some infuriating glitch in ones sensitivity, has a vastly disproportionate effect to the many positive ones which remain largely ignored. The lovely thing about Twitter is that, unlike reading blogs or online discussions, eighty percent of the comments are from people who are amiably disposed, and it warms the ego a little to delve into such kind thoughts, albeit sixty three times a day. The trick is to peripherally anticipate the occasional ‘@derrenbrown is a prick’ tweet, and jump past it still smiling, as it scrolls down into vision.

For those who find the thought of Twitter ridiculous, I do not presume to argue. Vapid and ludicrous, of course. I read a tweet from a tearful lady who had just received a hug from a person she didn’t know in the street and had decided on the spot to withdraw from Twitter (which had presumably taken up much of her time), implying that it was an empty place that bore no comparison to real-life relationships. Indeed it is, and should be no substitute for them. It is, most of the time, footling and featherbrained: luckily, we can enjoy plenty of things in life which are pretty inconsequential, and appreciate the wit and colour they add to our days. I can’t honestly think of a reason for the stuffed giraffe which is looking at me from my hallway other than I like it being there and it’s a fun place to hang scarves. But occasionally, with Twitter’s capacity to spread important ideas within moments, it can also be utterly majestic and invaluable. Though it has to be said you might not find that so much on my feed.

Right, I haven’t checked my mentions for almost twelve minutes now, so off you pop.

x

Good Afternoon Labia and Genitals.

Just to let you know that yours truly is working on a 3-part documentary series which will hopefully be out and about at the start of next year. What, oh what oh what oh what are the documentaries going to be about, I like to imagine you asking. Well shush your lips up and I shall say.

The idea is to spend a week or so for each one-hour documentary with a person who makes some kind of paranormal claim, and see what they get up to. As a sceptic (as opposed to a cynic), I’m interested in to what extent the evidence for their claims holds up, and thusly and therefore will be asking what are hopefully all the right questions along the way. Doing what I do for a living, my desire for these claims to hold up is accompanied by the fact I would love to be convinced and for the claims to be true. After all, I spend most of my time fabricating those very powers or worlds myself.

So far I’ve made two, and we’re doing one more for now. If you like them, then hopefully there’ll be more again. It’s been a fascinating journey for me, and there have been surprises and things I’ve learnt along the way. There have been very uncomfortable moments and some particularly eye-opening ones. The documentary participants have surprised me, and dealt with questioning that must have seemed at times relentless and pedantic. I certainly don’t have quite the gung-ho scepticism I had: I’ve realised it’s a much more complex and human area than I had imagined.

I shall blog more on the subject when the docs come out. We’re unsure of the title at the moment: ‘Derren Brown meets…’ and ‘The Unexplained’ have been suggested, both of which make me feel a little wobbly.

Hope you’re all happy.

Oh dear. I may really regret doing this. It’s a bit iffy. But by popular demand, here it is.

Just a brief reminder, as some people have said they didn’t know, that I’m very much on Twitter and loving it. I’m @derrenbrown.
That is all, thank you please.
X

Back home now, 3 am. The Events are now over and I want to thank everyone who tuned in over the last few weeks. Along the way, 20 million viewers tuned in – far more than any of us ever imagined – and I hope most of you enjoyed the shows. It’s been a real ride: I’ve had loads of fun making them, though I’m still reeling from tonight’s escapade. I called Ben as soon as I could and he doesn’t hate me, so I can sleep tonight.

Thank you again, all of you who watched or even took part in the interactive elements. Loads of love, and sweet dreams.

Derren x